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Innerbrat
Advancing the sum total of human knowledge and endeavour!
At home, in the airing cupboard, where sensible people keep them. 
25th-May-2007 04:40 pm
fandoms suck sometimes
I have not removed discworld from my friendslist. Neither have I posted the story about the wizards who observe the lilacs on Roundworld and start wearing them in the streets and Mr. Vimes going spare because I haven't written it I don't particularly want to.

For those of you new since last year: I don't wear a lilac. I don't have a lilac icon, and I heartily mock those who do.

But I have better things to do, like the rabbithole - I mean, my thesis.

My therapist and I have been talking about 'being' and 'doing'- about how I have constructing a false dichotomy between 'doing' which is active, productive and high-functioning, and 'being', which is passive, low-maintenance and involves zoning out. One of the problems I have is to sink into 'being' when I think I should be 'doing'. Or to get so stressed out that I'm 'doing' that I get stressed and anxious.

Part of my homework for this week (two weeks actually, bank holiday and that) is to keep a diary of when I catch myself getting too involved in one state and pull myself out of it (if I can - and the purpose of being able to recognised it is to note that I can. So.

The first instance was Monday evening when I found myself playing Ur and various flash games when I had things to do, including Chris' blog (oh gods, I'm the worst action-taker ever) and Millicon organdisation. The organdisation itself got done when I noticed this and started 'doing' (well some of it; I still have a few posts to make to the back room, but check me out, I'm like Rabbit!

Yesterday twice - I caught myself 'being' with rabbithole stuff in the morning, and then 'doing' instead of listening to The Greek trying to have a conversation with me in the evening.

Today there have been a number of times when I've caught myself 'being' - refreshing rabbithole and LJ threads (notifications hate me today), almost doing a meme on LJ etc etc. But I have been quite good at swinging myself into 'doing' thesis work whenever I caught myself 'being'. (It's bloody hard).

One day I would like to be paid for 'being'. This will not happen until I'm a professional novelist/blogger/other sort of writer. Woe.

This bank holiday weekend I will be with the InnerRents for the InnerDad's birthday. I should be online, though, if I can't persuade the InnerMom to help me with a Will costume.
Opinions 
25th-May-2007 03:48 pm (UTC)
I think sometimes one needs to just 'be', though. The key is to concentrate sufficiently on 'doing' when we are supposed to be, that we can relax into 'being' at other times without feeling guilty.
25th-May-2007 03:50 pm (UTC)
The key mostly, she says, is to avoid the dichtomy. I go to extremes - I'm either hyperconcentrating, or I'm zoning out.
25th-May-2007 03:58 pm (UTC)
*nods* Yes, I see.
25th-May-2007 04:15 pm (UTC)
Christ, I completely spaced on it being the Glorious 25th of May, and I just read the damn book a week ago...
25th-May-2007 04:45 pm (UTC)
Stuff the bloody lilacs I say, its National Towel Day.
25th-May-2007 04:48 pm (UTC)
Ah, May the 25th.

I plan to maybe post Havelock in. That will be my contribution.
25th-May-2007 05:22 pm (UTC)
I'm a member of discworld too, and I have no fucking idea what's going on there today. Apparently I'm a bad, bad Roundworlder. HALP?
25th-May-2007 06:18 pm (UTC)
*sigh*

OK, in Night Watch, Vimes, Fred, Nobby, Vetinari and Reg Shoe always wear lilacs on May 25th to mark the anniversary of a short-lived revolt and battle that only the very few people who were actually there remember (it marks Reg's death).

Those few people wear the lilac to commemorate this very private occasion and if anyone says "why the lilacs?" they get pissy. They get even more pissy when someone suggests people who weren't there should wear them.

Now, in Roundworld, since the publication of the book, Discworld fans have begun wearing lilacs on May 25th because for some reason I cannot understand (and I can't understand Valentines day or other arbitrary holidays) they want to mark themselves off as a fandom, alienating themselves from non-fandom people and perpetrating Discworld's ill-deserved reputation as a marginalised 'cult' series.

Two years ago it got particularly spammy over on discworld, and there were 22 contentless posts on the 25th May alone, and the mods (IIRC - I can't find the post) put a moratorium of spam posts outside that day. Later that year, howdotheyrise was started up for people who want to post over and over again about one scene in one book in a series approaching 40 full length novels.

One of the noticeable posts in 2005 was this one, started by someone who thought commemorating the event was kinda stupid, as it's supposed to be an attendees only event, and y'know, we weren't there. Most of the comments there were "ah, but we read the book, therefore we were there."

The next year, andrewhickey posted this mockfic, about "oh, yeah, you were there and we didn't notice!". That's when the wank came to the yard, because everyone who was fed up with the lilacs started saying "dude, lilacs are dumb!" and everyone who wanted to wear lilacs was all "dude, stop pissing on our parade!" and we made fandomwank.

This year, the overall opinion of the vocal members of the community has been "if you don't like lilacs than you're a bad Discworld fan and all the wank is your fault!" So, wisely, we've been keeping out of it and just hoping the spam wouldn't be too bad.

And luckily, it hasn't.
25th-May-2007 08:43 pm (UTC)
Aw, I forgot about the part my dear boy had to play in that. Though how I could forget is beyond me; his inbox was deluged and I heard all about it.

This year I completely failed to notice, which is somehow a bit less fun though it's better that you guys on discworld haven't been driven quite so crazy this time.
25th-May-2007 09:08 pm (UTC)
Oh I was waiting for an opportunity to go in, but right now it's just snide backhanders that I'm not willing to rise to.
25th-May-2007 08:16 pm (UTC)
Arrrrrrrrrrr!
love yr background!
25th-May-2007 09:07 pm (UTC)
Arrrrrrrr! Me background is tip-top, matey.

Uh, can I ask how ye found it?
7th-Jun-2007 02:52 pm (UTC)
arrr... good question. probably through an lj community?
7th-Jun-2007 02:54 pm (UTC)
Good enough answer :)
27th-May-2007 02:20 pm (UTC)
I know you don't want to post it, but is there any chance I could request it?

Because that just... I dunno, sounds like a good read.

Or summat.

:S
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