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Wolverine- An Open Letter to Deadpool Fans 
6th-May-2009 10:49 am
heart + stomach
Dear fans of Deadpool,


Welcome to the movie-recovery lounge! Come in and pull up a beanbag. There's tea brewing and biscuits in the tin;don't worry we don't have any  rich tea.

I wish I could say something reassuring to assuage the pain of having seen your character completely re-written in order to play an ill-fitting role in someone else's movie, but I can't really do that. It hurts, and nothing I say can stop that. I can warn you that you're going to have a lot of the movie's fans claiming you shouldn't be upset, and if you live in a fandom environment, you're going to have a lot of fans of this new version clamouring for attention, but even that won't be as bad as the Logan fans who say that Deadpool somehow deserve it.

Just stick it out, keep a stiff upper lip and be grateful the movie wasn't actually that good.  If you're lucky, your stay here won't be very long;  Catwoman fans spent a summer here, tops,before they realised no one cared enough out there.

So sit down, have a cuppa and make yourself at home, there's plenty of room; we expanded for an intake of Jarvis fans and Liz/Abe shippers last year, but they never showed up. And look on the bright side; at least it wasn't Alicia Silverstone.

A Batgirl fan.


My other comment about the movie comes in the form of a question I trust Marvel fans will be able to answer, about Adamantium.

It's a really hard metal, right? With metal-like properties (except for being hard). It needs to be smolten and poured and once set, is pretty much unmalleable? Not plastic, and because it's inorganic, not subject to Wolverine's healing factor?

Does this mean, that following this prequel, in all the X-men movies, Logan has two bullet holes in his cranium? Right in the front? That either provide a soft front for his brain or are sealed over by bone?

Because Izzy and I were talking, and we think it'd be awesome if this were the case, and you could poke him in the hole with a skewer every time you needed Wolvie to forget things. It'd be like having an X-man with his own personal re-set button.

 - y'know, assuming you can get close enough to Wolverine with a bullethole-shaped skewer. Which y'know, good luck with that.
6th-May-2009 09:49 am (UTC)
Am not going to be seeing the movie.
I like Jackman as Wolverine.
I do not wish to see the other two as Deadpool and Gambit.
They will be Wrong, and I will be angry.

Deadpool movie true to the comics, please!
6th-May-2009 09:54 am (UTC)
Actually, though I'm not a Gambit fan - my flatmate is - and they played merry havoc with his backstory and couldn't be arsed with giving him contacts, he was easily the fourth best thing in the movie.

(The top three, if you're interested, were:
- Hugh Jackman naked (a LOT)
- Hugh Jackman in leather
- Hugh Jackman walking or riding a motorbike while explosions happen behind him.)
6th-May-2009 09:59 am (UTC)
See, in comics canon firing adamantium bullets at Wolverine's skull would just mean you'd get a pissed off Wolverine. And several pretty much unblemished bullets.

In movie canon? Who knows? Maybe the bullets are still there somewhere. Maybe they fused to his bone, and are now part of his skeleton pretty much. Maybe they just hit his brain so hard they damaged it, but didn't really penetrate.

Who knows.

And I'm a Deadpool fan from the first series days. Didn't really bother me how they butchered the character, though I hope they make a proper Deadpool movie, to un-butcher it. :D

But I wasn't expecting anything from the movie other than what I got.
6th-May-2009 10:04 am (UTC)
These were Admantium bullets, though. I don't know projectile physics very well, but I think bullets made of melt Y fired at material Y from that range would at least melt a hole in them, as we saw. I imagine they proceeded to tear through his brain while slowing, and are now present as welded lumps on the inside back of his skull. No exit wounds, see?
6th-May-2009 10:25 am (UTC)
Well, if you look closely in the movie, when the holes in his forehead are healing over, it's shiny underneath, so either the bullets did not penetrate (unlikely, as if they didn't penetrate, then why would he lose any memories?) or they did penetrate, but the back end of the bullets sealed the holes in the skull.

What? It's not supposed to make sense, damnit. It's a comic book movie.
6th-May-2009 10:31 am (UTC)
I did! I looked really closely, and I couldn't see any evidence that the Adamantium itself was healing (Seeing the edge of the hole before the flesh heals is to be expected.)

I just like my version better.
6th-May-2009 10:45 am (UTC)
Any comics fan who's been round the block is used to seeing their beloved characters get bastardised beyond all recognition by Hollywood. It's a rite of passage.

If you'll allow me to show my age, I remember feeling a sense of intense disappointment when the Hulk's activities were limited to roaring and throwing guys around in the old Bill Bixby/Lou Ferrigno TV show. I would ask in despair, "When is he going to demolish a building, or leap twenty miles in a single bound?"

And some time later, there was Judge Dredd. "Why is he taking his helmet off? Why does he have a speech impediment?"

Thankfully, the film-makers occasionally get it right, or at least make films that are entertaining enough that I'm prepared to overlook their ifidelity to the source.

As for Wolverine, I'll wait to rent the Blu-ray when it comes out. I'm not really an X-fan, and all the positive comments I've heard seem to revolve around Hugh Jackman with his kit off, which isn't really enough to entice me to the cinema.
6th-May-2009 10:48 am (UTC)
Well, to be fair, Taylor Kitsch is also very very VERY pretty.

I can't recommend the female characters though.
(Deleted comment)
6th-May-2009 11:18 am (UTC)
Honestly, I didn't see any comics fans complaining about those characters at all. I mean, I twitched a little, because I love comics!Liz/Abe, but I saw much more "OH GOD DEADPOOL" here than I did "OH GOD JARVIS" or "OH GOD LIZ/HB!", which was a point I tried to make. I think because Iron Man and Hellboy are both very good movies, and this was just an enjoyable excuse to have explosions happen behind Hugh Jackman.
(Deleted comment)
6th-May-2009 11:27 am (UTC)
I liked Alicia Silverstone
*ducks and hides*

I think she was my "oh! girls can be superheroes too?!" character.
6th-May-2009 11:49 am (UTC)
That's allowed!

In fact, being that character for one girl justified her entire existence.
6th-May-2009 11:58 am (UTC)
-flops into lounge-

HELLO! You've just discovered one of the Blackbird-sized plotholes in the film! It's okay, we've got booze.
6th-May-2009 12:09 pm (UTC)
I don't think it's a plothole? I love the idea of Logan now having a reset button. Imagine the fun you could have poking it!
6th-May-2009 01:03 pm (UTC)
Why do I suspect I will be writing a similar post after I see the JJ Abrams Trek film?
6th-May-2009 02:38 pm (UTC)
I dunno. The movie gave the impression, post credits, that Deadpool would live to wisecrack another day. I liked Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool, even if they graphed his name and personality on to Shatterstar's body, and appearantly, so does Deadpool, who's insisted in the comics that he be played by Reynolds in the movies. That's fair.

They need a butt ugly Deadpool (Reynolds in jacked up Silent Hill make up works) and hopefully the ending will be the sort of thing that gets him to snap out of the Weapon X programming, once he gets a good head back on his shoulders. Stryker's doctor said they weren't finished with him, so the tacked on powers like Cyclops eye beams and Wraith's teleporting about might simply not take, though his healing factor taking would be appropriate. He just needs to slice his mouth back open, get some spandex, and he's good to go*.

*Personally, I'd have Tarantino direct any Deadpool movie, since Tarantino is the only director who's up his own asshole enough to put in all the pop culture references, breaking the fourth wall, and excessive ultraviolence necessary to make a proper Deadpool movie.

Incidently, Cyclops is officially 4 for 4 in terms to being dicked over as a bit character in an X-men movie. I found it hilarious that they virtually put ALL his scenes, and Emma Frost's scenes, in the trailers to make it look like he in any way mattered to the story line. This concludes the global war on Movie Cyclops, since I doubt he'll get a chance to be in other movie.
6th-May-2009 06:21 pm (UTC)
I don't know comics at all, so I was mostly just miffed that they wasted Ryan Reynolds' A. hotness and B. smartassedness. If his purpose is not to be hot and make funny wisecracks every so often, then he doesn't need to be cast, dammit.
6th-May-2009 06:25 pm (UTC)
The point of Deadpool is to make funny wisecracks all the damn time while not looking hot at all.
7th-May-2009 06:57 am (UTC) - SPOILERSPOILERSPOILER



Also, Deadpool WTF. His badassness in the beginning was perfect, if only they would just do that but make him an ugly fucker. Did you stay to theend of the credits? That little bit made me kind of happy. With the mouth.

jakey and I have a theory, about the katanas. The stupid, stupid, entirely impractical and worthless katanas. Now that he's a programmable robot anymore, he gets pissed off and rips them out of his arms, and uses them as his actual swords.

Also, while the lasers thing was also extremely stupid, I did notice that they burned his skin into the signature black diamonds which are supposed to be on the mask.

Confused about seeing Pietro in the facility, the kid's not supposed to be that old, unless I've been completely tainted by all the wrong canons and he's actually an adult.
7th-May-2009 08:44 am (UTC) - Re: SPOILERSPOILERSPOILER
What the hell is everybody talking about?

Yes, we did wait until the end of the credits. We waited through all that rolling credits and music, and we got Stryker not walking anymore. No Deadpool to be seen.
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